Parent questions: meltdowns, screen time and routines
Short, practical answers from Ricardo de la Peña, M.A., BCBA, LBA, for families of children about 2 to 10. Educational information, not therapy or medical advice.
What should I do during my child's meltdown?
Keep everyone safe first, then say less. Use a calm voice and a few words, such as "I'm here. You're safe." Lower the noise and the demands, and wait for the storm to pass. Teaching and talking it through work better later, once your child is calm. When Big Feelings Take Over walks through what to do before, during and after a meltdown.
How can I prevent meltdowns before they start?
Look at what happens right before them. Many hard moments follow the same triggers: changes in activity, hunger, tiredness, hearing "no", or ending something fun. Give a warning before changes, keep routines predictable, and practice calm-down skills on calm days, not only in the middle of a storm. Writing two lines after each hard moment (what happened right before, and what happened after) often shows the pattern within a week or two.
What should I do after a meltdown is over?
Once everyone is calm, reconnect first. Then repair: help your child make things right in a small way, and practice what to do next time. The goal is learning, not shame. The free Family Workbook includes repair steps and a calm-down plan you can fill in together.
How do I turn off screens without a fight?
Decide the limit before the screen turns on, give a heads-up before time ends, and have the next activity ready. When it's time to stop, stay close, use the same short words every time, and follow through calmly. Protest is common at first; staying consistent is what helps it settle. The Hard Part Is Stopping covers screen time step by step.
Is the Family Workbook really free?
Yes. The Family Workbook is a free printable PDF in English and Spanish, with a calm-down plan, repair steps and daily practice pages. No sign-up is needed. Get the free workbook here.
Do I need a diagnosis or ABA services to use these books?
No. The books are written for families of children about 2 to 10, with or without a diagnosis and with or without services, including families who live far from services.
Are the books available in Spanish?
Yes. Every family book has a Spanish edition: Cuando las emociones se desbordan, Lo difícil es apagarla and Guía de Padres Empoderados. See the Spanish page.
Where can I buy the books?
Paperback and Kindle editions are sold on Amazon. PDF editions are in the Uplifting ABA shop.
Who writes these resources?
Ricardo de la Peña, M.A., BCBA, LBA, a board certified behavior analyst and licensed behavior analyst (Texas) with over 10 years in applied behavior analysis.
Is this therapy or medical advice?
No. These are educational resources, not therapy, diagnosis or medical advice. For safety concerns, medical questions, or if you're worried about your child's development, talk with your child's doctor. In an emergency, call your local emergency number.
Do you offer materials for ABA clinics and RBT trainers?
Yes. Uplifting ABA Academy licenses RBT development and supervision tools and a 41-topic bilingual caregiver education collection to organizations. See resources for clinics.